Do I have a dependent attachment? Discover the signs from psychology
What is dependent attachment?
Dependent attachment is a form of emotional bonding where the fear of losing the other person becomes so intense that it affects one's own well-being.
It usually develops from early experiences where the attachment figure (parents, caregivers...) was not secure, stable or emotionally available.
Five signs of an insecure and dependent attachment style
1. Excessive fear of abandonment or rejection
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Constant anxiety at the thought of the partner moving away.
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Recurrent need for validation.
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Interpretation of neutral gestures as negative signals.
2. Difficulty to fully trust
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Mistrust of the stability of the bond.
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Frequent doubts about whether the other person loves you.
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Control behaviours or need to check affection.
3. Tendency to self-sacrifice and over-indulgence
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Always prioritise the other person over yourself.
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Difficulty in setting limits.
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Intense fear of losing a partner's affection or approval.
4. Intense emotional ups and downs and dysregulation
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Moving from euphoria to fear or sadness with ease.
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Impulsive reactions to small signs of detachment.
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Need for the partner to feel emotionally regulated.
5. Idealisation of the partner
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Place the couple on a pedestal.
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Believing that without that person you would be unhappy or lost.
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Low basic self-esteem.
What to do if you recognise yourself in this pattern?
The important thing is not to label yourself, but to understand that this attachment style can be worked on. Therapy is a safe space where you can rebuild your way of relating, strengthen your self-esteem and learn to bond from a healthier and fear-free place.
Do you need accompaniment? We can help you
In our psychology office we work with people who, like you, are questioning how they bond and what lies behind their fears in a relationship. If you have seen yourself reflected in any of these points, we can accompany you in your process.
📍 Therapy in Fuengirola and Online
If you are worried about being in a toxic relationship, you might want to take a look at our entry:
Warning signs in a couple : Toxic Relationship
Post written by Samara Valenzuela
If after reading this post you think you may need help and would like to know more about Samara as a professional, please CLICK and visit her contact profile.