Perinatal bereavement: how to cope with the loss of a baby during pregnancy or after childbirth in Fuengirola and Mijas
Perinatal bereavement is a deeply painful and invisible experience that occurs after the loss of a baby during pregnancy or shortly after birth. At CALMA Psicólogos, in Fuengirola and Mijas, we offer specialised psychological support to help you through this process, integrating the loss and rebuilding your story with respect and emotional care.
What is perinatal bereavement?
Perinatal bereavement encompasses the death of a baby at any time during pregnancy or shortly after birth. Although the term “perinatal” is defined biologically from 22 weeks to the first 28 days of life, emotionally the experience of loss may begin much earlier.
This type of grief involves not only the pain of the death of a son or daughter, but also the loss of a life project, of the role of mother or father, and of the imagined future of life with the baby.
Common emotional and physical reactions in perinatal bereavement
Frequent emotional reactions
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Shock and disbelief at the news.
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Deep sadness and longing for having had the baby and for it still being in our lives.
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Guilt, remorse and anger, both towards oneself and towards others (partners, family members, medical personnel...).
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Anxiety, helplessness and fear in the face of a world that has suddenly changed.
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Loneliness and misunderstanding by the environment.
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Envy towards those who do have their children with them or who have not suffered loss.
Physical responses in the body
The body also expresses grief: fatigue, sleep disturbances, loss of appetite, a feeling of emptiness, tightness in the chest, or even physical perceptions such as a feeling of continuing pregnancy, kicking or readiness for breastfeeding, especially if there has been an advanced gestation process.
Bonding with the deceased baby: a valid and necessary process
Far from forgetting or “turning the page on the episode”, mothers, fathers and relatives continue to feel a bond with the baby. Talking naturally about him or her, keeping some objects, gifts, photos or ultrasound scans can be healthy ways of maintaining the memory of his or her existence and the emotional and social connection. This is part of a natural, not pathological, experience.
Recovery or transformation? A mourning that is being rebuilt
Grief has no set date for «getting over it». It is a dynamic and fluctuating process, in which the person integrates the death, accepts their current reality, redefines their identity and finds meaning. It is not a matter of returning to who one was before, but of discovering who one is now, with this new situation.
The stages of grief: myth or reality?
Although it is common to talk about the different phases (denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance...), the truth is that grief does not always follow a linear order, nor do all the phases have to occur. Each person goes through the process in a particular way, experiencing phases in different order or simultaneously.
Every grief story is unique.
Perhaps it may be of interest, where, from Calma Psicólogos, we expand more information about THE DUEL
For some people, conceiving of bereavement as a phased process can be reassuring. However, this view has been criticised on several grounds. On the one hand, it is seen as an oversimplification of a profoundly complex experience, which varies significantly from person to person depending on their history, their bond with the deceased and their cultural context. On the other hand, even if we adopt the idea of phases, grief rarely follows a linear or predictable path. It is more common for people to move through different emotional states in a less structured way, moving back and forth or staying in one state for longer than expected.
From this perspective, while the notion of phases can offer some structure or comfort, it can also generate frustration or discomfort when personal experience does not conform to this framework, and can, in some cases, hinder the grief transition process.
Social silence: the disavowal of perinatal bereavement
In many cases, the environment does not recognise perinatal bereavement as “valid”. This can make the process even more difficult, as it prevents people from talking about, remembering and mourning the deceased. The invisibility of grief is a form of emotional violence that prevents progress.
Acknowledging the loss and the right to express it is fundamental to healthy grief processing.
Does benchmarking help? Yes, but with nuances
It is natural to look for references in other people who have experienced something similar. It can help to feel understood and accompanied. However, it is important not to force yourself to grieve as others do. Every story, every family, every body and every emotion is different.
When to seek psychological help
If you feel that you can't go on any longer, that the pain is overwhelming you, that there are difficulties with your partner, in your environment or with yourself, we encourage you to ask for professional help. At CALMA Psicólogos we offer respectful and specialised accompaniment in perinatal bereavement, both individually and as a couple.
There are also support groups that can be very useful for sharing and processing collective experience.
Accompaniment at CALMA Psicólogos
Our team of psychologists in Fuengirola and Mijas is committed to offering a safe space to deal with this kind of loss. If you have suffered a gestational or perinatal death, you are not alone. We accompany you so that you can integrate this experience into your life and your personal history.
Are you looking for help to overcome your perinatal bereavement in Fuengirola - Mijas or online?
📍 Face-to-face consultation in Fuengirola
🖥️ Therapy to overcome loss online from anywhere
👥 Professional, warm and friendly service tailored to your needs
💌 Contact us today and take the first step to start working on your loss.
📲 [624 00 21 27]
📧 [info@calmapsicologos.com]
📍 C/ San Pancracio 7, Edificio Terminal I, 2º-5, Fuengirola (Málaga)
I am willing, able and ready to help you with your loss.
Samara Valenzuela | Psychologist
N. Member: AO14046
If you are looking for support to manage anxiety, improve your relationships, strengthen your self-esteem or deal with changes in your life, I would be happy to accompany you on this journey.
Age group: 18-65+
Appointments: Telematic and face-to-face
Perinatal Bereavement Contact Form
Before - During - After the session
What does a session include?
When you book a session with us, you are choosing a service that is divided into several actions, pre- and post-session.
In addition to a space designed for you: confidential, respectful and change-oriented.
Each online session is designed to offer you a complete therapeutic experience through the screen.
Preparation time prior to the session
Before the session, and based on the information you provide about the reason for the consultation. We work on preparing the best possible framework.
The online/face-to-face appointment
Exclusive space and time for you for the duration of the consultation session. Approximately 50 minutes, sometimes a little more, sometimes a little less, every day and every person is different and appointment times may vary, always prioritising what is best for your needs.
During the session we listen, we ask questions, and we take notes, The Commission's position on this issue is always in line with theality and empathy. With active listening in a non-judgmental space, but with an eclear and professional approach.
Preparation time for: Guidelines, materials, session outline
After the session and on the basis of the previous framing work, we spend time on guidelines:
- Personalised objectives tailored to your needs and your time. Guidelines, exercises, tasks and recommendations to achieve change.
- If necessary, we will make a summary of the session and work materials.
- Follow-up and reminder of appointments. By giving continuity and accompaniment during the therapy process, up to the moment of discharge.